Body Positivity – My Postpartum Truth

 

Near the end of my pregnancy I wrote about body positivity and rocking my bump. About how great pregnancy made me feel, and that I wanted to hang on to that post pregnancy, remember that my body had grown two beautiful humans and that was awesome no matter how my shape had changed.

 

Well I’m here to tell you I’ve failed. Miserably.

 

I do not feel like the awesome warrior I did. I do not feel remotely empowered or like I’m owning my body.

 

I feel tired. I feel lumpy. I feel achy. I feel drab.

 

I was “lucky” that not long after I’d given birth I was back to my pre pregnancy weight and back in my usual Jeggings. I was already over weight and hadn’t actually gained a huge amount so this wasn’t like the “spring back” you see from celebrities, but it was gone.

 

But then life happened.

 

Weight Gain –     I make bad food choices, I didn’t make good on my original plans to have delicious and healthy meals prepped and ready in the freezer. I snack on convenience food, fast food, chocolate bars. And when Christmas hit, well that was just another excuse (not that I needed one) to eat every single pig in blanket within sight! It was ok, I’d grown a person. And looking after two small humans gave me the need to consume so much sugar. Or carbs. Or preferably both. And my weight ballooned to being the heaviest I’ve been. Ever. Including during pregnancy.

I know that this diet is neither healthy or helpful. I’m getting the energy boost from a sugar hit, but I’m also getting the lows of the comedown. And then the tiredness hits harder and the cycle continues. I say it often but I really wish I drank coffee, at least a caffeine hit would be a bit better than an early morning sugar dose. I know this can’t continue.

 

 

Breastfeeding –     Occasionally I feel totally badass for breastfeeding. I’m fascinated by what I can produce to nourish my baby. And when I feel like it might not be enough, I take a look at my chunky little baby and am reassured, most of the time. However, there’s an aspect that I wasn’t really prepared for. Fashion.

I need to be accessible at all times. Accessible without flashing too much flesh. Vest tops layered with a bigger t shirt or jumper has become my new uniform. Which is great, it’s comfy and can take what this job throws at it. Or throws up on it. But I am constantly thinking about my tummy. Is the vest covering it? Is it riding up as the baby wriggles? Is anyone looking at my flabby belly!?

It’s like a constant reminder of the weight I’ve put on. Sat on the sofa, being held hostage by this adorable and hungry bundle, and avoiding eating a decent hot meal so I don’t risk spilling anything over him.

 

 

Hair Loss –     During pregnancy your hair pretty much stops falling out. Your hormones have got better things to do than to keep up with a normal cycle or hair loss and regrowth that is normal. So it kind of ‘stocks up’. Your hair seems thicker, healthier and you fell fab. I felt fab.

Then a few months after you’ve given birth, those pesky hormones panic. They’re trying to get back to normal. Essentially they panic, and it seems all the extra hair they’ve been clinging onto need to go. That instant. Next thing you know you’ve got enough hair to make a wig just from one brush.

For some unknown reason, this is happening more in the areas above my temples. I know that this is a common thing, for the hair to thin and regrow around the temples and hair line. But mine seems excessive. And there is nothing that makes me feel less confident than the bald patch on the left side of my head. It’s not a “thinning patch”. It is bald.

 

 

I am a mess. I couldn’t feel further from the glowing, curvy woman I was just a few months ago. And it’s down to me to fix it. If all it took was for someone to tell me I was still beautiful, I wouldn’t have a problem. Mr H has told me daily, at the very least once a day, how beautiful I am to him. But unfortunately I don’t feel it.

 

 

So I know I need to take control. No one is going to deliver healthy meals to me, I need to organise them. No one cares what I look like when I’m feeding, if they see anything it’s the super cute baby and not my flabby tum. And if they do? Sod it! Hair grows. I’ve had to adjust my style to distract from The Patch, but at some point that hair will grow back (and no doubt I’ll be back to have a small whinge at the fluffy, sticky out regrowth, but I’ll forget about that for now).
I want that feeling loving my body and myself back.

 

 

Did you struggle with postpartum body issues? what is your best tip to overcome them?

 

 

Mrs H xxx

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The Siblings Project – February 2017

 

This last month there seems to have been a growth in the boys’ relationship. G is just as lovely with him, wanting to share toys with him, pass him stuff and talking about what they’ll share when B is bigger.

“When he get bigger he can share my toast. But not now. He too little”

“When he get bigger mum he can go on the BIIIIIIIGGGGGGG slide with me!”

“He too little to play. But when he get bigger he share with me”

My. Heart. Is. Melting.

Don’t get me wrong I am fairly certain that I will be reading this back in a few years and scoffing at the idea that they’d “share” and wander off to break up another fight over who’s toy it is they are fighting over, but I can live in hope!

The biggest change this last month is in B. He will of course, change so rapidly over this next year. And this month he has started to become more interactive with G. His eyes follow G around a room, watching where he goes and what he’s doing. And he is giving G huge smiles when he comes over to talk to him. Which means he actually wants to talk to his baby brother that bit more. I guess it’s nice to have some proof that he’s listening to him.

G can almost always make his brother stop and listen, and cheer him up if he’s a bit grumpy (not a full blown crying strop.that’s a job for boobs!). 

We often joke that B isn’t a mummy’s boy or a daddy’s boy. He’s G’s boy!

Mrs H xxx

The Me and Mine Project
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Be In The Picture – January 17 

 

 

The lovely ladies from All About A Mini Norris and Baby Holiday have started a fab linky, encouraging us parents to Be In The Picture more. And boy do I need it!

This post includes every photo taken during January that includes me. Two are with the children, one is with Mr H when we went out for my birthday. All of them are selfies. 

To be fair, Mr H has been saying the same thing for years. Stop stressing about how I look, or how I think I look (I wish I was as fat as when I first thought I was fat!!) and just be included. 

 

I’m always taking pictures of the boys. In fact I recently joined in with the Sibling linky to make sure that I document their relationship. And I’m often posing the boys with Mr H to get photos of the three of them. But I rarely include myself. Even during date nights or trips with family or friends. I’m always taking pictures of everyone else, but never including myself. There’s the odd selfie here and there, but rarely a proper photo with me in it. Searching through the pictures I’ve taken in January just proves this. I’ve really struggled to find photos with myself in them, and the few found were selfies!

 

There’s always some excuse. My hair is a mess, I’ve got something down my top, I need to lose more weight, and it goes on. But looking through old photos of my own mum I never look for these things (ok I laugh at the styles, but in fun!) I just like looking back at photos of us together, trips that she took before me and fun times that she has had. If I don’t start being in front of the camera more, my own children will never be able to look back on these memories.

 

So from now on I’m going to try harder to get more photos that include me. Especially more family photos.

 

Do you make sure you’re included in photos? Or are you missing from photo history too?

 

Mrs H xxx

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Beat the January Blues

January is a notoriously tough month. The mood is always a bit down after the over excitement of Christmas, financially things can be tight for the same reason and everyones back at work and dreaming of sunnier days. The weather doesn’t really allow for a lot of outdoor fun either, there’s a big lack of vitamin D too and I know personally that my positive attitude suffers because of it. So how do you beat the January blues?

If possible we usually try and arrange some sort of trip in January, it’s my birthday at the end of the month, so can usually tie something in with that. Usually just a day trip to London, or sometimes if budget allows it can be an overnight trip. Even if we can’t actually go on a trip during January, it’s a good time to start planning and saving for one, and have something to look forward to later in the year.

This week we received an invite to visit Bluestone Holiday Village. We’re really excited for our first visit there, it looks perfect to help blow the cobwebs away. It’s in one of our favourite places, west Wales.

Mr H has been incredibly busy in work since before B was born, so it’s going to be perfect for his week off to be able to relax and have a proper week away.

We’ve been looking at the activities available on site and there is so much to do! G is going to be really excited to visit the Blue Lagoon swimming pool. I say will be excited as we haven’t told him we’re going yet. We recently made the mistake of telling him we’re going on an airplane holiday this year and almost everyday since he’s asked if “we going on the plane today?”. All holiday announcements are now going to be held off until the morning we leave haha!

I’m looking forward to getting out in the fresh air a bit more. I’m struggling to organise the house right now and it’s getting to me a bit. It’s feeling a bit stuffy and cluttered so I think a week away and bundles of fresh air will really improve my mood and let me look at the house with fresh eyes when we get back. I’m hoping to get myself some wellies before we go too so I can join in with any puddle jumping! Who says toddlers should get all the messy fun!? But there’s also an indoor activity centre if the weather is typically Welsh.

It’s going to be B’s first holiday too. I realise he’s only tiny and will have no idea where or what is going on, but i know he’ll love having us all together for a week. There’s also a few baby activities on site. There really is something for everyone to do!

Bluestone have got some really fantastic offers on at the moment, and with restaurants on site and even an option to get your weekly shopping delivered to your lodge for your arrival, it’s easy to book a last minute trip and get on the road!

Are you planing a family trip soon? What do you do to beat the January blues?

Mrs H xxx

Disclosure- we’ve been offered a mid week break in exchange for a review. All opinions are honest and my own. This is an introduction piece, we haven’t visited Bluestone at the time of writing this post. 

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The Siblings Project – January 2017

I’m so excited to join in with the Sibling Project! 

Oh how wonderful it is having two fantastic children. After an ectopic pregnancy in 2015, there was a short time I wondered if we would have any more children. We were, of course, really lucky to have G, but it’s been so fantastic to add B into our little tribe.

We talked about the baby throughout my pregnancy, explaining to G that his baby sibling was growing in my tummy, and as the due date neared we talked often about the baby coming out and coming home. G was so lovely, cuddling my bump and saying ‘aww! baby!’ and making cradling actions. He was really excited.

I was sure that he’d be great when the baby arrived at first, but the novelty was bound to wear off, and poor baby was in for a few digs or sly pinches. After all, it’s not easy to share your toys at 2 let alone your parents!

But honestly? G has been amazing! Any jealousy or frustration has been taken out on us and not the baby. Which isn’t lovely, but it’s better than it being taken out on B! And he’s just so loving towards him. Wanting to cuddle him and give him kisses. He tries to share toys he thinks are appropriate for a baby to play with, soft toys etc, and talks about what he’ll share with him when B gets bigger.

He is such a great big brother.

Now that B is 3 months old, his personality is coming through a bit stronger.

He clearly adores his big brother, giving him huge smiles whenever he’s near, and often lets out a big cry when he goes away.

He’s never phased when too big toys come playfully towards his face, or when the cuddles are a little bit smothering. 

I’m so excited to watch them grow together, and hopefully become the best of friends. And to record their special relationship through this linky. 

We love our boys so much!

Mrs H xxx

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Goodbye 2016!

The time has come to say Goodbye to 2016 and Hello 2017.

This year has been a bit of a strange one on a wider scale. Politics and celebrities have dominated the headlines and not for positive reasons. politics in both the uk and US have had some surprising results, and other countries have remained fractious or even worsened. And 2016 will surely be remembered for the vast amount of passings from well loved famous faces. 

But from a purely personal point of view, 2016 has been an amazing year!

There’s been hundreds of good things happening throughout the year, and as a family we feel stronger and happier than ever before. Something we are fiercely proud of as me and Mr H have been together since we were quite young, and 2017 will see our 12th year together!

Mr H’s business continues to grow and I am building on something I love doing, as well as our beautiful family.

Here are just a handful of our highlights from 2016.
January – had a lovely weekend away with Mr H for my birthday, and visited the Harry Potter Studios. I could visit every week, its an amazing place!


February – a lovely (if a bit windy) family holiday to Fuerteventura with Mr H, G and my parents.



March – found out that we were pregnant with baby 2!


April – my parents got their beloved motorhome (we love you Lexie!) and more adventures began.


May – G’s second birthday, complete with party. He danced and laughed and had the best time. 


June – Britmums Live! From dreaming of going last year, I didn’t think this year would be happening. I had a wonderful time and got to meet and make some lovely friends. 


July – a family holiday to the Isle of Wight with Mr H, G and the in laws. We do love a caravan holiday!


August – a 2 week trip to Cornwall. A change in the original travel plans meant we got to explore somewhere new, and moved the original location to a trip for 2017.


September – our annual trip to Tenby! We certainly didn’t scrimp on the travelling this year! Tenby is one of our all time favourite places and we love going back to visit.


October – hmmm….October?? what happened in October?? Oh yes, that small matter of a new member of our tribe! We welcomed Baby Herniman 2 into the world. It was an amazing experience, and amazing to find out that we can love another person as much as we already love G.


November – full of cuddles, cute moments and adjusting to life as a family of 4.


December – B’s first Christmas. Jam packed with family, friends and fun. Busy, chaotic and lovely all at the same time. I wouldn’t want it any other way.

We’ve enjoyed such a wonderful year, this really is just a fraction of everything that we’ve enjoyed. 

2017 is set to be just as exciting and wonderful for us. Full of love, adventures and cuddles (but without the giving birth part!)

Wishing you all a happy and healthy 2017

Mrs H xxx

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The Christmas Tag

My wonderful blogging friends from Hi Baby and Teddy Bears and Cardigans tagged me to share my answers to the Christmas tag that’s been going around. 

I’ve had to edit this as it was scheduled to post days ago but it failed (and I didn’t notice…bad blogger!) but it’s now Christmas Eve! 

If you’re more organised than me, then you’ll be sat enjoying a festive drink and snack, and have time to read a few festive posts. If you’re like me then you won’t be reading this until New Year because you’ve barely finished shopping, let alone wrapped anything!!

Here’s a look into Christmas at The Herniman House

What’s your favourite Christmas movie?

On Christmas decorating day it has to be the Santa Clause with Tim Allen. 

Possibly my favourite is Home Alone two – Lost in New York, but honestly I don’t think I could pick there’s so many that I love to watch at this time of year.
Have you ever had a white Christmas?

Not that I can ever remember. I’d love to have one (G definitely would!) but on a year where we’re having lunch at home so we don’t have to drive in it.

Where do usually spend your holiday? 
We’ve always alternated every year between my parents and Mr H’s parents. This year we are going to the in-laws for lunch and next year with thinking about maybe having my parents to our house for lunch instead of going to theirs.
What’s your favourite Christmas song?

I’ve narrowed it down to 3 choices, Fairytale of New York, Driving home for Christmas, Stay another day.

Fairytale of New York was always a childhood favourites because it gave you an excuse to say swear words haha!!

Driving home for Christmas always just gives me that cosy feeling of going home to your family, and it’s Mr H’s favourites.

Stay another day is just hilariously cheesy, the video is even better and it was the first song on Christmas album that we used to listen to you on Christmas morning opening presents. 

Do you open any presents on Christmas Eve?
Years ago when me and Mr H were first together we used to swap our gifts on Christmas Eve because we didn’t spend Christmas day together, but now we usually exchange pyjamas or some small gifts.

We sometimes exchange gifts with family, possibly the ones we not seeing on Christmas Day so that it’s not too full on and it’s a spreads out the gift giving out especially for G (and now B).
Can you name all of Santa’s reindeer?

Dasher, dancer, prancer, vixen, Comet, Cupid, donna, Blitzen, Rudolph (and Chad if you count the Santa Clause two movie!)
Which holiday traditions are you looking forward to this year?

Is it really bad that I think they’re food related!? I love doing my Christmas Eve ham and having smoked salmon scrambled eggs and Bucks fizz for breakfast. I am of course really excited for Christmas dinner but I also love all the leftovers that you picked out for weeks later. 

Non foodie, I’m looking forward to Christmas Eve pyjamas and putting out the mince pie and drink some carrots with G and B. 

Is your Christmas tree real or fake?
We have a faux Christmas tree, I deliver real one but we just haven’t got the room and we have a toddler!

What is your all time favourite holiday treat/food/sweets?
Seeing as my answers to one of the last questions was mostly food related I’m pretty certain I couldn’t choose one! But I do really love pigs in blankets and dates in blankets.

Be honest, do you like giving or receiving gifts better?
Both! I love getting gifts, who doesn’t?! But I love watching people’s faces, especially when I think I’ve got them something they’re not expecting. 

What is the best Christmas present you ever received?
As a child it has to be my double pushchair. Taking two dolls out for a walk was just the best thing ever!! 

What would be your dream place to visit for the holiday season? 

I’d love to go somewhere with snow, a cosy cabin or cottage. But I’d only want to go if my whole family could be there too. 

Are you a pro present wrapper or do you fail miserably?


I’m appalling! Mr H does all the wrapping. I’m truly shocking. I only wrap my gifts to him, and it shows. Patchy paper and whole rolls of tape. It’s just awful.


Most memorable Christmas moment? 


I’ve had so many lovely Christmas times, I really don’t think I could choose one.



What made you realise the truth about Santa? 


Truth? What truth? 


What makes the holidays special for you? 

Spending time with family. Even those we see often, more effort is made. I love getting to see those we don’t see as much too. 

Those chilled of days watching telly and eating loads of food. To be fair that sounds like me all year round, but it feels more special at Christmas ;) 
I’ve really enjoyed reading other’s Christmas tag posts. 

I’ve not tagged anyone to do this next, because theirs no one else silly enough to still be writing their posts! But if anyone would like me to link to theirs please let me know and I’ll edit it in.

Have a great Christmas!

Mrs H (and the rest of us!) xxx

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Little Angels Festive Nappies

It’s not too late to add that extra little bit of Christmas magic to your day by getting a pack of Asda Little Angel festive nappies. 

Featuring a ‘Santa’s little helper’ Christmas design, each limited edition Supreme Protection nappies will add an extra element of fun to his Christmas time! 

I’m one of these people who needs to go completely overboard at Christmas. I don’t mean budget wise, I’ll be bargain hunting even harder than the rest of the year. These festive Little Angels are as affordable as the rest of the range. I just mean that I love everything to have a festive touch. Wearing Christmas socks and jumpers on a trip to see the lights, wearing tinsel in my hair on shopping days etc. I love that these nappies will let me do that for G too. Unfortunately they only come in 4+ 5+ and 6+ so they don’t come small enough for B yet, he’ll just have to wait until next Christmas.  

They have been given a sprinkle of Christmas magic, but you can rest assure that Little Angels Supreme Protection nappies still provide the same protection, and there’s less chance your little ones will wake up soggy when Santa arrives. 

 

Anna Plester, from ASDA Little Angels, says:
“At ASDA, we know nothing brings more joy than seeing a child’s face light up on Christmas morning. 
“Adding a touch of seasonal magic, ASDA Little Angels Supreme Protection will transform your child into ‘Santa’s little helper’, so they can enjoy every second of the festive period.”

Does anyone else like to go a little bit overboard like me? What festive touches have you got for your day this year?

Mrs H xxx

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Bravado Designs Body Silk Seamless Nursing Bra – Review

I was given the opportunity to review a Bravado Designs Body Silk Seamless Nursing Bra near the end of my pregnancy, I was excited to receive a maternity bra that was comfy and stylish, and that I could wear for comfort after I’d had the baby.

But as I mentioned in my recent update (Adjusting to Our New Normal), I’d not expected breastfeeding to work so well, so I never looked at getting a decent nursing bra in case I didn’t need it. 


I had no idea that this item of clothing would become my best friend, and something I could love (almost) as much as I love my children! The only time I’ve opted for an alternative is when this one is in the wash. I’d held off on buying another, as I didn’t expect breastfeeding to work, but I’ll certainly be investing in another, I’m always waiting at the washing machine to see if it’s finished so I can have my bra back! 


This bra has seen me through the last 7 weeks, day and night, and withstood all the mammoth cluster feeding sessions. It’s been there for the days and trips out, but more importantly it’s also been comfy enough to sleep in too. An essential when you have to grab sleep when you can and don’t have time to waste on changing. 

The bra is soft and comfortable, as you’d expect from a maternity/nursing bra it has no wires, but the thick band around the bottom gives plenty of support. Pre pregnancy, and even during my first pregnancy, I can not wear an un wired bra. I find they don’t provide the support I’d need, but I’ve not felt like I’ve been missing that at all with the Bravado. 

Another thing I usually find with maternity/nursing bras, is that they have a thin material cup. In “normal” life I like a moulded cup, I prefer them to enhance my shape, not so much to alter my size, but just to smooth out etc. The Bravado has removable cups, so it’s given me the confidence of a “normal” bra, and made me feel a lot better about my clothing choices too. The cups are removable though, so if you’d prefer a bra without, this is still suitable and super comfy. 

The clasps are really easy to use, and can be unclipped with one hand. The strap is also attached to the bra when undone so it’s not going to slide away and disappear, no fumbling down your top once a public feed has finished. 

The other thing I’ve loved is the colour. I loved the burgundy colour when it arrived, a nice autumnal colour, season appropriate and just a nice treat. But it’s actually become a bit more important as my nursing wardrobe is incredibly limited. 

I’m still learning what I can and can’t feed in, especially when out and about. So I tend to stick to the same tried and tested outfits and vest tops for layering. The vest tops that I have don’t fit to cover the bra completely, but it’s not an issue, as the fabulous colour simply looks like another layer or top. The style and colour fits in with my outfits so well I’m not left feeling at all embarrassed or conscious that my bra is showing. 

I really didn’t think I could ever be this in love with an everyday essential, and I’ve tried hard to think of something I’m not so keen on to sound constructive, but honestly? This bra has been perfect for me, and an absolute lifesaver. I loved it as a maternity bra, but nursing has been a whole other level of love ;) 

Did you have a favourite maternity/post baby item? Do you love anything as much I’ve fallen for a bra?! 

Mrs H xxx




Disclosure- I was sent a Bravado Designs Body Silk Seamless Nursing Bra for the purpose of a review. All thoughts and opinions are honest and my own

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Adjusting to Our New Normal

It’s been 7 weeks since the newest member of the Herniman tribe joined us, and it’s been a whirlwind few weeks adjusting to our new normal.  

In one sense it’s like he’s always been here. He’s slotted into our lives as a perfect little addition. I’m finding the sleep a lot less harsh than first time round, as I’m already sort of used to it, even though G was sleeping through quite well most of the time, I’m used to the mornings getting up and on with the day, and the rough schedule we have. 

Though saying that, I do remember G being a fab sleeper for the first 8 weeks, regularly sleeping 5-6 hours straight from midnight to 6am, which suited me just fine. But the after his first set of jabs it went downhill for a long time after that. 

B is slightly less reliable to have those hours but isn’t too bad, letting me get in about 4-5 hours sleep in one block, which is lovely. I’m bracing myself for the first jabs to put a stop to that again though. 

B is looking very much like his big brother, which at times, sleep deprived, hazy times, is just a tad surreal. It’s like flashbacks! He’s also long like his brother. By the time these kids hit nursery they’re going to be taller than me! I got the weirdest look from the woman at soft play yesterday, when I told her G was 2…I may have to start carrying his passport around just to prove I’m not trying to scam 2 quid off the entry price, he is actually 2! B looked the same size as a 9 month old baby waiting for swimming lessons last week, so I’m pretty sure he’s growing the same way. 

A big surprise for me this time round has been breastfeeding. It just didn’t work with G, I expressed for 5 weeks and topped up with formula, but it wasn’t for us. I felt a little bad and guilty at the time, but ultimately we were happy and healthy, and G was getting fed so it was all good. 

I’d decided to try breastfeeding again this time, I wanted to try and find help if we were finding it difficult but on the whole had a very relaxed attitude of “whatever works”. I was taken completely by surprise when he latched on with out any trouble at all, and 7 weeks later is still permanently attached! 

I’ve been asked about my plans for feeding, how long I’ll breastfeed for, and until what age, but to be honest I’m so shocked it’s even happening I’d not put any thought into how long. I’m just going with it for now and seeing what happens. 

It’s been a hectic but wonderful few weeks, and I know that it’s only going to get weirder and wilder! We’re still very much on a steep learning curve with G, let alone adding another to our roller coaster! But I guess that’s parenting full stop, right?! 

Mrs H xxx 

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